- This article is about the short-length version from Fred's CD. For the full-length end credits version, see Don't Touch My Ascot.
Oh no (No no no)
Don't tug my ascot
Don't pull my ascot (It's my ascot)
(oh baby. you ooh ooh)
You can't touch my ascot cos' girl it's mine (it's all mine)
(Do da do da do da)
Scooby-Doo! and KISS: Rock and Roll Mystery
- Out of all the KISS songs in the film, this is the only one they recorded specifically for the film.
- The album cover of The Ascot Five: Greatest Hits! contradicts the end credits by calling it "You Can't Have My Ascot".
- Written by: Tony Cervone, Greg Collins, and Jared Faber.
- Performed by: KISS, Greg Collins and Jared Faber.